February 7, 2011

Can it be made right?

Have you ever loved something, really loved something, and then had it change or taken away from you and been left feeling bereft or angry? Have you watched something you love crumble beneath your fingers and not been able to do a thing to stop it? Have you been left to wonder why?

I have seen this happen a lot lately, with churches, with my Austrian home, with families... it hurts and yet there seems to be no logical reason. No way to stop the inevitable, no way to control the ultimate damage and hurt that it will cause. I heard this week about 2 little boys who are about to undergo a change that will likely damage them for life, but there is no way to stop it, no way to fix it and it breaks your heart, or mine at least. It causes anger and pain, even though I don't know these two boys, even though I have never met them or even seen them face to face. I feel for them and I am angry for them and I ache for the weeks, months even years of recovery that this will take if it's even possible to recover fully? I am left wondering, where is God in the midst of this? What is his plan? How can this be made right? Can it be made right?

I have heard of a church that was torn apart from the inside out, left in ashes and the culprit, gone to the wind, moving on to new and better things to destroy...

My castle home, once a thriving ministry is now a shadow of it's former self, the building remains but little else exists to stand as a testament to the lives that were changed there.

I have seen a friend be destroyed by change, left in the path of destruction and no one got in the way to stop the train or pull this friend from the tracks, nor was this friend able or willing to get out of the way...

So, today I am sitting here wondering why? Where is this all leading? What plan can possibly come from this? What good will come out of it? Is there something I should have done, could have done? Is prayer really the only answer to the pain I see steaming down the tracks at the people involved? Do I just sit by and do nothing or is my need to be God and take control getting in the way of God doing his work? What are you supposed to do in situations where there is nothing you can do?

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